Relationship Goals! It is so easy to get caught up on your social media timeline to see happy couples everywhere. Wow they are so in love and just happy all the time. Reality check, relationships took a lot of work. I talked about them in, 5 Dating Tips for Millennials. Often times we post great moments on social media to share our happiness with our friends and followers. But what about what happens behind closed doors? How devoted are we to making sure that our partner is happy and satisfied?
I found myself so consumed with social media and blogging that I neglected to give my attention to someone that matters the most to me, my husband. Meanwhile here I am posting about our lives but I am not spending time with the person I am posting about. How ironic? The reality is no one’s relationships is perfect but that does not mean we should not put in effort to make it the best relationship we can. I was so consumed in my phone that one time I did not speak to my husband for hours and we were in the same room. Yikes.
I didn’t even realize how much time I spent on my phone until we both had a conversation about going a day without our phones. The agreement was our phone was on “do not disturb”, a feature on the phone in which all notifications are turned off except for emergencies, as we spent the entire day together. This meant having an actual date without taking selfies on Instagram or capturing footage for Snapchat. Normally on our dates I would post about my date on Snapchat. But that day was different. I felt a strong connection with my husband and not my phone. Putting the phone away was the best thing for us. My love language is quality time, spending time with my husband is crucial to me. I was reminded why I fell in love with this man in the first place. I got a chance to look deep into eyes as he gazed in mine. His love language is words of affirmation, thus by spending time with him it allowed me to communicate to him with words of praise.
After that date, we decided that we would devote at least one day a week without our phones and go out with each other. I realized that I did not need the notifications to go off every two seconds. I took another step further and turned off my notifications on all social media platforms and emails permanently. It was really distracting for me to focus with my phone going off all the time. It was definitely a game changer in our relationship. Spend more time with the person I love and less time on my phone; iit was a sacrifice we both made. I’m glad we did it.
What are items that you and your significant other had to sacrifice to make the relationship better?